Memories Don't Stop For a Pandemic
I never expected to bring home my first child during a pandemic.
I never expected to sit across the room from doctors (6 ft away) and ask how to keep my newborn safe while meeting his grandparents. Or to have nobody see my 9 month pregnant belly in person. Or not be able to introduce our tiny person to our friends. What a crazy reality, guys.
Here’s the truth...our lives aren’t stopping for this pandemic. Milestones in our lives are being passed all the time...celebrating them & documenting them just looks a little different.
I understand first-hand how hard it is to see important events so altered and restricted. But it also doesn’t mean they aren’t special memories worth celebrating. I don’t want your milestones to get lost in the seemingly endless days of social distancing, and repetitive routines & restrictions.
I will always remember what it was like being a first-time mom in the middle of a pandemic. As strange as it sounds, these memories are almost more special because these are hard times. These little things keep us tethered to what we love. And isn’t that everything? Families & weddings & babies & life events...those deserved to be remembered and celebrated.
I’ve been spending the last few weeks making sure I can still deliver on photographing these events for you. Whatever makes it doable, I am here for it, guys.
*Your little one is having a birthday and you want a front-porch session to remember it? I’m there.
*You are missing your planned wedding date because you had to postpone? Plan a socially distanced couples shoot to mark the date! (I’ll bring the champagne!)
*You are bringing a new baby home from the hospital after a very different birth than you wanted? I’ll help you document those early days at home so you never forget what it was like.
*You just got engaged? HELL YES, let’s celebrate that shit. I’ll wear a mask, and keep my distance. You two just make-out and be cute.
*You’re pregnant and missing your baby shower? Girl, I’ve got you. Let’s still capture that amazing preggo-belly with some maternity pictures to share with your loved ones virtually.
*You want Christmas cards to document your family in 2020? I’m your girl.
ALL THIS TO SAY: this covid mess doesn’t stop your life, and those memories are worth keeping. One day you’ll look back and more than ever, you’ll want photos life in this crazy year of 2020.
I will help you document your life in a safe, comfortable way. I’ve got your back. <3 Here’s what that means for me:
I always wear masks on my shoots.
I sanitize my gear.
I sanitize my hands.
I wear fresh clothes.
I stay 6 feet away.
My studio is sanitized before use.
Your memories deserve to be documented. AND you also deserve to stay safe. <3
Have questions at all about shooting during covid? Message me HERE. Let’s make those milestones special!
Modern Studio Boudoir Shoot
This chica was absolutely fire during her modern, studio boudoir shoot here in Austin, TX. We ended up with a FULL gallery of amazing images she got to pick from. Spoiler: she couldn’t pick so she got the whole thing haha. (Most people do!)
She gave me permission to share these online so I wanted to feature a few images from her session. I hope you feel empowered to try this yourself. <3
Introducing: NEW In-Home Studio
Welp, can’t believe this fell into my lap and that it’s actually happening, but I officially have an in-home studio. I opened my boudoir business almost a year ago, and I did several in-home shoots in my tiny apartment previously. We made it work, and had some killer photos in there, but it always felt a little cramped and unstyled to me. I wanted a space that I could really make my own. Not just stylistically to get the kind of photos I wanted (although, yes, that too), but also to create an inviting space for those women who are trusting me to shoot their boudoir images. I know it’s a huge deal to hire someone to take photos of you in lingerie. I get it. And I wanted a space that felt calm and creative and inspiring.
I’m very influenced by spaces. I am forever seeking out the restaurants, coffee shops, hotels, and stores with the best “vibe” and look. They inspire me more than almost anything else. And so when I got the opportunity to create my own I really took a step back & let myself get very inspired about how I wanted it to FEEL.
My goal as I designed the studio was to have a haven for the women I was photographing. A calm space to clear your head, and feel inspired. A space to let go and feel free to express who you are. I want you to feel at peace walking through the door, and sense the kind of laid-back, modern imagery we’re going to be capturing.
For me that translates to a lot of white walls and quiet, uncluttered spaces. I have always, always been drawn to negative space. A lot evolves in a photographer’s style over the years but that has been a staple for me from the beginning. Negative space.
It creates such profound space for the subject of a photo.
So I painted the walls white, and purposefully put together a very simple design. In fact, you can see my Pinterest inspo board here if you wanna check out the ‘behind the scenes’ of the process.
I decided to make a wall collage of other empowering babes, which creates a cool blurry grid in the background of some photos. That adds texture to an image. And I also included a styled nightstand for some details to draw the eye in wide-angle images.
So there you go! That is the process & background & “why” for the design.
I hope it makes you feel so calm,
& inspired,
& so YOU.
-J
PS: scroll to the bottom to see a shot from my most recent shoot in the studio!
Three Ways to Keep Your New Year's Resolutions in 2020
three practical ways to keep your New Year’s Resolutions in 2020. None of the fluff, all of the real-life shit to keep you accountable!
So it’s the second week of January and we all feel that slump for real. New Year's resolutions are good in theory, but changing habits takes a ton of effort. I’m the queen of believing I’m a superhero and can just power through any resistance (hiiiiii Enneagram 8).
But the truth is, sometimes we need some re-aligning & intention to keep moving forward with those goals. You SET them for a reason, they are desires you want. Here’s 3 tricks on how to maintain those New Year’s Resolutions:
#1: DO ONE DAMN THING YOU ENJOY:
Holding yourself accountable and making big changes can be mentally draining after a week or two. Next time you’re driving home from work, turn off the radio, and brainstorm something you can do this week that is simply because you enjoy it. You don’t have to compromise your goals either! If your goal is: “eat healthier”, you don’t need to go get a pint of ice cream. Nah, girl.
Go on a hike.
Get out your paints out from the closet.Meet up with a friend you like.
Go to a happy hour (order a vodka/soda water/lime! It won’t spike your blood sugar.)Watch a TV show you like.Go for a walk on Town Lake….take a picnic lunch at Zilker park.
You get it.Just take some time for mental respite, it will go a long way towards the longevity you need to accomplish your goals.
#2: REASSESS YOUR GOALS (this doesn’t mean you’re failing!)
Okay. If you’re like me you’re thinking: well shit, that just means I somehow ALREADY effed up. Nah, sis - I promise. Reassessing isn’t failure.Although: do yourself a favor and create proper space for you to sit down with your goals. Light a couple candles, pour yourself a glass of wine, (or whiskey if you’re me), and open that journal back up to your 2020 goals.*And if you haven’t written them down: I’m sorry! WHAT? Go do that first!!!*
Point is: a great atmosphere makes the world of difference so do whatever that means for you. Maybe you prefer to curl up at your favorite coffee shop in the morning instead. Or go on a long walk. Regardless, treat yourself to an experience you love in order to get back in touch with your resolutions and align from there. This isn’t a chore & it’s not a failure. The goal is to be able to look at your goals objectively so that you make practical decisions, and not emotional. You’ll be able to feel the difference.
Here’s the deal: maybe when you set your goals, you missed some very real logistics. Maybe there are barriers you can simply remove. Maybe your goals just need to be tweaked in order to accomplish the same feeling you’re after.For example: maybe “I’m going to work out 6x a week” has turned into an issue because of work scheduling or an honest need for a social life. It could be realigned to:“I’m going to the gym 4x a week, and the other 2 days I will do 15 minutes of yoga before bed”.
Or if your goal was: “I’m going to get up at 5am” but you keep pressing snooze: remove that barrier by plugging your phone in across the room so you HAVE to get out of bed to turn it off. Re-assessing doesn’t always mean adjusting your goals - it just means looking at them with experience now.
Don’t be afraid to make your goals work for you. They SHOULD challenge you. But they also shouldn’t be causing tremendous stress. The overall goal is always to feel good. (And if you wanna know more about that, I highly recommend this book).
#3: TOUGHEN UP, BUTTERCUP.
Sometimes, you just need to be mentally tougher. Only YOU can tell what is letting yourself off the hook, & what is a powerful shift towards your goals. If you’ve objectively re-assessed and your goals simply ARE set up well…then you gotta be stronger. And you can be! Resistance is a great teacher, if you let her. Learn from these mid-January slumps in your goals, and prove to yourself you can make changes. There’s nothing like that feeling of empowerment that comes from powering through.
Okay! There ya go! Three tricks to make it through if you’re hitting a wall with your goals. Don’t just throw your intentions away - that doesn’t honor yourself or give yourself a very big vote of confidence. Do something you enjoy, reassess why things may not be working, and be stronger than the old habits.
That’s it! Comment below and share if you have other ways of holding yourself accountable!
An Interview With A Boss // Jenny Collen
photo by: Jenny Collen
Jenny and I met through Instagram. (Or was it Facebook? I don’t remember now haha) I was flying out to California for a weekend and asked if any photographers wanted to meet up and she responded that she’d love to connect! She had juuuust gone full time and, like me, just wanted to know some other photographers face-to-face. (Working from home means no co-workers, guys. Having friends in the same field is so important). We met at the cutest little restaurant & immediately clicked. We wandered down to the beach and Jenny took some photos of me where she somehow made me look put together even though I had been sick all day and just had my hair thrown up in a not-cute messy bun. (I’m not being modest, it was not cute). She’s got that particular gift for really getting the heart of a person in a photograph, not everyone has that, and it’s really special. ANYWAY we have kept in touch across the country so when I started reaching out to people to interview for this blog I knew she had to be on the list.
I am excited to introduce, Jenny Collen! I know you’re gonna love her & her story (also her pictures which are abso-lutely-freaking-incredible):
photo used with permission by Jenny Collen
What’s your name: Jenny Collen
Tell us your Instagram Handle: @jennycollen
What field are you in?: Wedding Photography!
photo used with permission by Jenny Collen
What drew you to your work? What's your story?: What drew me to wedding photography can only be talked about in the most cheesy ways, but they're all so true!! I really love connecting with people, I love taking photos that make you feeeeeel, the photos you want to look at every single day of your life! I love all the corny, mushy cuteness.
The more interesting part is probably how I got here. Because it took me a whiiiile to figure it out. I seriously had so many jobs before I started my business. And I was pretty embarrassed about that for awhile! When I started posting on social media about doing wedding photography I cringed at what I *thought* people would think. In my head people were saying, "And now she's a photographer?!!". Because I really was all over the place. I went from working in film production, to working at a college, to working in a law office, to photography (with lots of other part time jobs sprinkled in there)! I know that didn't make sense to the people around me, but I just had to try all the things out and figure it out on my own. And now that I know none of those jobs are for me, it makes me work so much harder as a business owner. Like I can't fail at this because there is nothing else for me haha.
What's your favorite thing about what you do?: I seriously love it all!!! I love getting to be creative and working with people and traveling, but if I had to pick one thing, it's probably the fact that I'm my own boss. That I can run my business how I want, that I can try things out and fail at things. It's my name and my brand so I feel super invested in giving my clients the best possible experience. And it's pretty cool that the amount of money I make is directly linked to how hard I'm working, I get to actually see results and that's really rewarding.
What's your Enneagram Type?: I just took a test because of this question! I got 7w3. So I'll start looking into what that means more :)
photo used with permission by Jenny Collen
As a modern working woman, what's your biggest struggle right now?: Oh, man. Being a woman is hard. I've heard that women typically feel like they need to be "qualified" for a position before they apply for it where men typically don't. And I can for sure say that's true for me! The idea of whether or not I'm "qualified" is probably my biggest struggle. Feeling like I can't put things out into the world until they're "perfect" or feeling like someone else is already doing it better than me so I should just quit. I'm trying to get better at ignoring the mean voices in my head, and not overthinking in general.
What ways do you find to create work/life balance?: I'm not great at this. When I'm at home it's really hard for me not to work. One thing Jordan (my bf) and I have started doing is cooking dinner together (almost) every night. Since we have to eat, it's a good way to make sure we stop working and enjoy some time together. I'm getting really close to the point where I only work until dinner and not after, but there's still some gray area here if I'm really busy.
What ways to foster excellence in your life/self/work?: Oooo this is a good question. I think something I've always been pretty good at is trying things that scare me. I absolutely hate networking, it's the worst, but I try to go to a networking event or meet up with someone that I don't know at least once a month. I hate seeing myself on video (like does my voice really sounds like that?!), but I've started taking a video of myself on my phone every day to get more comfortable with it. I for sure don't post them all, but it gets easier every time. And now it's way easier when I do have something I want to post. I still have lots of things I need to work on, but I think pushing myself outside my comfort zone has helped me grow a lot in life and in business.
photo used with permission by Jenny Collen
What would be your #1 piece of advice for dating/relationships?: My best piece of relationship advice is to find someone who supports your goals & dreams. If your partner doesn't, it's so much harder to attain them. And they kind of suck for not supporting you?! And then it goes the other way, support them too! It doesn't have to be financially, but encouragement and understanding goes such a long way!!
Okay just for kicks: if you could only eat one meal for the rest of your life, what would it be?: Tacos. Hands down. I feel like the variety of tacos is limitless and they're all delicious.
What is your favorite place you've traveled? Or are you a homebody? (No wrong answers here): I'm such a homebody in my own town, I would much rather stay in for the night than go out. But I absolutely love to travel! My favorite place that I've been would have to be Iceland. It just had the craziest landscapes I've ever seen and I'm dying to go back! Next time I want to go for longer and drive/camp around the whole country. It's so beautiful. But also have so many places I still want to go.
Ever met anyone famous?: I don't think I've ever met anybody famous. I live in LA so it's not that unusual to see famous people, but kind of weird, I've seen Harrison Ford 3 times!! Like am I a stalker?! Apparently, we frequent the same salad place haha.
Also kind of funny, when I first moved to LA I worked on a few episodes of The Bachelor, so I kind of "met" a lot of the people on the show. But I've never watched a single episode and couldn't tell you who they were.
photo used with permission by Jenny Collen
If you needed no money, and weren't allowed to work for the rest of your life, what would you do with your time?: When I worked a 9-5 all I wanted to do was not work. But now that I work for myself I absolutely love to work and have such a hard time stopping. So this would be a huge challenge, but I would probably just travel a ton and take photos. And maybe build a cabin on a lake. And go to Disneyland.
If you could give any advice to your younger self, what would it be?: So cliche, but so true-- don't worry about what others think. The best thing that I'm finally coming to terms with is that people really don't care what you do! I mean it might cross their mind for like 5 seconds, but then they move on because they're way more worried about their own life.
photo used with permission by Jenny Collen
So that’s it! If you liked this interview, leave me a comment. I legit don’t know if you liked it unless you tell me so don’t be shy! And while you’re at it, go leave Jenny some love over on her Instagram!
What's Going On With The Enneagram?
Okay Okay.
So you probably keep hearing about this “Enneagram” thing, or maybe you’ve even taken the test but like...what is it???
I’ve gotcha.
I get asked about the Enneagram all. the. time. And while I’m no expert, I definitely have done my research and am more than happy to share what I know! Ya ready?! Mk let’s go:
Okay Okay.
So you probably keep hearing about this “Enneagram” thing, or maybe you’ve even taken the test but like...what is it???
I’ve gotcha.
I get asked about the Enneagram all. the. time. And while I’m no expert, I definitely have done my research and am more than happy to share what I know! Ya ready?! Mk let’s go:
So, let me start by saying if you feel a little lost in a sea of random numbers...you’re not alone. The Enneagram DOES have a lot of information and researched involved, so you’re not wrong to be like...wtf is this?
In a nutshell, The Enneagram is a personality test. But unlike Myers Briggs, DISC or the like - the Enneagram is all about uncovering your motivations behind your behaviors, not analyzing the behaviors themselves.
Make sense?
So, like, people with the same “number” (or Type) can look like very different people on the outside, but they share a Type because of what motivates them. In this way it’s very inclusive. It speaks to all different personalities and allows opportunities to grow (wow I feel like I’m writing on a corporate website with that sentence haha) BUT YOU FEEL ME RIGHT?? It’s a complex little bugger but it offers a lot of insights & practical tools.
I’ll be the first to admit I hate personality tests. I never identified with them, and felt like overall they weren’t offering that much. No thank you.
Que the Enneagram.
Where other mechanisms just tell you what you are, this tells you why you feel the way you feel. Which is somehow way more enlightening and helpful. I think this is WHY it’s so wildly popular right now. People be feelin’ SEEN.
I mean, ultimately it’s just a tool for understanding yourself & others more, and while some people really make it their bible, I think it’s best applied as just a lens to get to know yourself more! Always a good thing.
Feel pretty good about it so far? Yeah? Okay. Let’s look closer. WTF do all these numbers and random “w”’s mean??
Here’s what you need to know:
The Enneagram is organized into 9 different numbers or “Types”.
Each number has a different core fear vs. desire that makes them tick.
Once you identify number (which can take a while, do the work and research!), you can also identify with one or both of the numbers on either side of your dominant number for your “wing”. For example, you could be a 2. And then your wing would be either a 1 or 3. Making you either a 2w1 or a 2w3. (Starting to make sense?)
Okay if you’re feeling pretty good about all of this, I’m gonna add onto that. Each type also has arrows. The arrows indicate what that number does in stress, vs. in health. So like, a Type 1 goes towards a Type 4 in stress, and a Type 7 in health.
Look at the diagram again, it makes more sense that way:
Mk so those are the basics! Let’s get into the nitty gritty. I’ll list a synopsis of the different types below to give you a foundation. And I’m going to steer away from stereotypes you’ll find on the Insta memes. Because while those are fun, (I follow a bunch of those accounts too), they often are pretty narrow in their depiction of each type which isn’t very helpful when you’re trying to figure out your type. So read over below, and then hop over to The Enneagram Institute, and read over the types you think you might be in depth. And honestly, pay the $12 for the little test on there, it’s worth it. The free ones I took were trash.
K, now that’s outta the way let’s go:
Type One: (“Reformer”)
This type’s basic desire is to be good/have integrity. The basic fear is to be corrupt. Ones tend to have a strong inner critic, which often guides them. They are often principled, & organized. In stress, they often withdraw. While in health, they tend to be playful. Read the official shiz on 1s HERE.
Type Two: (“Helper”)
This type’s basic desire is to be loved. The basic fear is being unwanted. Twos are often generous & kind, and can err on the side of ignoring themselves to help others. In stress they can lash out. While in health they get better at self-care, & are emotionally aware. More HERE.
Type Three: (“Achiever”)
This type’s basic desire is to be valuable. The basic fear is being worthless. Threes are super driven, able to adapt to social environments, and work their asses off. In stress they can become apathetic. In health they become committed to others alongside themselves. All the 3 things HERE.
Type Four: (“Individualist”)
This type’s basic desire is to have a unique identity. The basic fear is having no significance. Fours are usually seen as artists and pioneers, they tend to relish in their emotions. In stress they can become co-dependent. In health they become more objective. More HERE.
Type Five: (“Investigator”)
This type’s basic desire is to be capable. And the basic fear is being useless. Fives are known to be researchers. They typically know so much random shit, and often have a very limited reserve of energy. Once they’re spent, they withdraw. In stress they get scattered. In health they get more decisive. More HERE.
Type Six: (“Loyalist”)
This type’s basic desire is for security. And the basic fear is being without support. Sixes are good people to have on your team because they are able to think through many angles of a situation & offer advice. In stress they can get hyper-competitive. While in health they become adaptable & relaxed. Read the full description HERE.
Type 7: (“Enthusiast”)
This type’s basic desire is to enjoy. And the basic fear is to be in pain. Sevens are known for being wild, life of the party, always bursting with ideas and plans. These are the friends you wanna take to the bar haha. In stress they can become critical. But in health they engaged & interested in life. Read alllll about them HERE.
Type 8: (“Challenger” )
This type’s basic desire is to be in control of their own lives. The basic fear is being controlled. Eights are often seen as aggressive, but usually that’s just because they are direct & honest. They have big hearts, but are usually more known for taking charge. In stress they become withdrawn & hyper focused. While in health they become more empathic & others-focused. All the shiiz HERE.
Type 9: (“Peacemaker”)
This type’s basic desire is peace of mind. The basic fear is loss/separation. Nines are known for being easy-going, they tend to go with the group and mesh well with teams. That doesn’t mean they don’t have a backbone though! Although, they often struggle with a sense of identity. In stress they can be anxious. While in health they are focused on self-development. More 9-ness HERE.
OKAY SO THERE YOU GO! Now you are an Enneagram expert in the making lol.
But if you are still like: I RELATE WITH ALL OF THEM THANK YOU...just know that is normal. I recommend focusing on the basic fear/desire, as that is often the biggest indicator to your type. Read over several different ones, and see what you relate the most with. Ultimately only you can type you.
Okay so, have an idea what your type is?? Have questions? Comment below, I’d love to chat Enneagram craziness with you!
- Jessie
(yep, 8w9)